Truths: Life goes faster than you think

Wow! Things have been a whirlwind. My life has changed in so many ways in the last few weeks that I have a hard time even catching up.

Just yesterday I was teaching my niece how to drive – which is something I thought I had another 5 years before I would do it with my daughter. But there I was handing over the keys to Megan and wondering if I was going to be one of those basket case parents freaking out at every turn.

I got in the car, took a deep breath and… she did great! I was actually very calm and re-assuring. It wasn’t until she hit the gas instead of the brake at an intersection that I cried out! But, she reacted quickly and nothing happened…except my heart jumping into my throat.

We drove on highways, through road construction (how can you not in IL?), in neighborhoods where we came within inches of hitting a garbage can – we were both too busy looking at the houses, and we practiced parking – not parallel parking because even I don’t know how to do that!

She really did great and I think I did too. And, now, we have set it up that ever Wednesday I will hand over the keys and put my life in her hands. How exciting!

Three weeks ago, I became a grandma – a real grandma! My step-daughter, Kristin, had to have Josee 6 weeks early due to complications. Lil Josee was born weighing 4 pounds and stayed in the NICU for almost three weeks fighting to gain weight. Kristin and Josee are both home now and Josee is busy gaining weight and doing well.

At 39 you don’t expect to be a grandma. Grandma sounds old and when you are still busy raising an 11 year old and having baby showers for your own friends – it just seems…crazy.

But, let me tell you that though it seems like there is no way you can really be a grandma – the minute I held Josee in my arms – I felt like a grandma! I was head over heels in love and already dreaming of watching her grow-up. I couldn’t believe that this was my granddaughter to love and to spoil…to babysit and to worry about.

While the timing was unfortunate for Kristin and Josee – being premature – it worked to my advantage because the her first week of life was my week in school and because she was a preemie she was born in Madison only 5 minutes from my class at University of WI. I got to see her everyday! Which was amazing. I got to hold her and feed her and watch her grow – watch her hair change color and see her with her funny billi light sunglasses on. Those are all moments that I won’t forget.

I feel like in just a few weeks – my entire world has changed. Things I only imagined happening years from now – have happened and my life is in fast forward. Which also made me realize that life is so much faster than we think. It doesn’t have to take a funeral to remind us that life is short – it can take even happy events to remind us to cherish each day, to enjoy each moment – because they go by so quickly and you just never know what is coming next.

It has me re-think my priorities – a lot.

My class was phenomenal! Really phenomenal! What I was so worried about beforehand was actually life changing. I learned so much and had an instructor who gave me so much insight on my novel – I was left completely inspired. The peers in the class were also wonderful. Reading each others works and hearing their thoughts on mine – added so much depth to my understanding of the craft and left me with so many ideas for how to keep going.

Most importantly, it has made me take my writing seriously. Not just as a hobby – or kite dream – but as a profession. Having a book in the works isn’t enough if I don’t make it a priority. Watching my life flip into high gear these last few weeks only screams to me that I need to decide if I am serious about getting this book published.

And I am – so I have decided to make my novel my job – not just some random hobby I get to do when everything else in my life is done. And, I am excited, very excited.

The last 4 weeks have changed me and how I pictured my future which always seemed years away - teaching me that the present is all that really matters and what we want to do with it – has to start now.