Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Truths: 11 Years Ago

Today is my daughter’s 11th birthday… Which, of course, causes a bit of reflection on the last 11 years…

And, of course, the one event that can’t go without mention is the actual day of birth. For 9 months or less (since we all tend not to know until we go months without our period making every excuse in the book why it hasn’t come yet) we are told what an exciting time this is, how lucky we are.

There are beautiful baby showers full of gifts: most you have no clue how to use. There are all those “kind” people who feel the desperate need to feel your belly and comment how they never gained “that much weight.”

Once you are pregnant – you become everyone’s business – practically, a human science experiment.

And that’s not even the worse part… For me… I was puking my guts out for most of the pregnancy. I looked like Hell – and certainly did not have that cute little basketball that looks supermodel perfect in hot maternity clothes. No, my ass and my legs and my face got just as round as my belly.

The real clincher was seeing the movie on delivery. We left the Lamaze class that day – and I cried the whole way home… “There HAS to be another way to get this baby out,” I said to my husband. “I am NOT doing it.”

As if we have any control over it.

On December 1st, my water broke at 7am and by 9am we were at the hospital. Everything was going well until I got that first contraction. OMG… you have to be kidding me.

My wonderful nurse came in and I said, “Is it going to get worse than this?” To which she replied, “Do you hear that woman in the next room (SCREAMING)? That is how bad it is going to get.”

I asked for the epidural.

The epidural is my hero, my savior and everything in-between. After that, my entire labor was perfect. Abby was perfect… And lucky for me – it is all on video so I can watch it again and again. Definitely something to have popcorn with…and a few shots of Tequilla!

I won’t talk about the days that followed… no one ever does. And, there are a lot of reasons for that…

But, I will say that that day seems like just yesterday. I don’t know where all the years have gone: first haircut, first tooth, preschool, riding a bike, taking the bus, whole days of school. So many monumental firsts and still so many more to happen.

There were days that I longed for some alone time, some quiet time…time not taken by hauling around a 2 year old and trying to find a dress or a gift… But now, I have all that quiet time. Abby is busy with soccer and friends and basketball and friends.

It is amazing to see her grow-up – to start to see the adult she will become. To see her friends and to picture them friends at 16. It becomes nearly impossible to believe that she was ever a part of me – growing..

Next year she goes to Jr. High… I have never cried when Abby started to school… But there is something about Jr. High that is so scary for me… The boys, the secrets, the hormones.

Most of all I know – that if history repeats itself and I get a kid just like the one I was… (our parents always threaten us with that) There are going to be some major blow-outs between her and I… And that is going to be hard… maybe even harder than labor.

So, today we celebrate her birthday – the fact that she is here with us and we are blessed to have her. We are happy for all the memories and we look forward to all the amazing things that are yet to happen.

And quietly, I celebrate that I never have to go through labor again… because even after 11 years – I remember it like it was yesterday!

3 comments:

  1. You are such a wonderful mother and such an inspiration. Abby is so lucky.

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  2. What an awesome post ... thoughtful, funny, and so, so true. Happy Birthday to your sweet girl!

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  3. Happy Birthday, Abby! I remember that day so well!

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