Truths: When determination matters

Do It Anyway
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis it is between you and God;

It was never between you and them anyway.
Mother Teresa

So, the above quote inspired me – so much that I asked for a framed print of it for my 40th birthday… Okay, I ordered it for myself. I thought it was the perfect mantra for turning 40 and realizing that my life was my own and that I should pursue things that matter to me regardless of what other people think or what might happen or even if someone destroys my work later.

The quote may infer that I believe in religion and well, I don’t necessarily. I do believe that there is a GOD, a being of sorts that we do answer to when everything is said and done – that being good does make a difference in this life. I just don’t need a book or a church to tell me that.

Well, we came home from Jamaica and I decided it was time to hang the picture that came right before I left (it was backordered until after January – I ordered it in November – apparently – a lot of people felt it was the kind of quote that should hang on their wall).

I moved around some other artwork to make room and when I went to hang the picture – well, disgusting as this is – the cat (who knows which one – none of them will tell me) peed on it! And, no it wasn’t just on the glass or the frame – it had seeped inside and ruined the whole thing.

Deflated and disheartened, I sighed. My mantra was destroyed.

Being the intuitive that I am – I had to quietly question the picture’s fate. Was this some sign that I should pick another quote – more like the one I was actually given for my birthday as a gift, “Yoga, Gardening, Bubble Baths, Medication and still I want to smack somebody.”

Fitting as that one is for me – it isn’t the way I want to live my life… No, this quote spoke to me and damn it – no cat was going to take that way!

While a part of me didn’t want to tell Bill (he already despises the cats) I was so crushed I had to share my unhappiness. He, of course, cursed the cats and then said he would be happy to get me another one.

I just ordered it… and lo and behold – it is on backorder again until February! People REALLY want to live by this mantra!!

I guess the thing is – I could have said to Hell with it and chalked it up to a lesson learned, “Don’t leave important things laying around for the cats to pee on… But, it meant something to me – and that made me want to go through the efforts and the money to get it again.

I know it is just a quote, just a quote on a piece of paper that is elegantly framed – I could just print the quote out and hang it on my bulletin board… But, I want it to be for everyone to see – because I think it is something that says a lot about who I am…and who I want to be – and maybe how I wish everyone was.

I was determined to make this happen.

Today also marks my long awaited… (really my unflailing procrastination) day to get back to my writing…my novel…my dream.

Some of you might recall that the last time I decided to get back on this train… my computer exploded and well, all of that was the perfect gateway to postponing doing any writing… Then, there was the house mishaps with all the appliances and the water problems and then there was Christmas… and well, there is always something.

And, I envisioned all along sitting down to my perfectly appointed office – everything organized and clean – the sun shining and me not having a care in the world – other than writing for the day.

Hah!

One of the other birthday gifts I got from my best friend, Kelly, was the book, “Stephen King – On Writing,” by Stephen King. For a writer, I think the book is amazing. Stephen King is hilarious and really just says it like it is and finds way to help you along the way. But, there was one quote in there:

“It is, after all, the dab of grit that seeps into an oyster’s shell that makes the pearl…”

He explains that it is the other things going on in your life that allow you take necessary breaks from your writing so that you can come back to it with fresh eyes and new perspectives. In other words, there is no perfect time to write. You just have to write, damn it!

The book is what I needed. While my life is just as busy as it always is and my office is cluttered and somewhat unkempt – I am writing today because it is time – no more excuses.

Every time I start to picture myself working on my novel – I get anxious. It’s this mix of excitement and desire and this fear of failing. And then today – as I tossed and turned in bed thinking about how the day would go – I realized that my anxiety was no different than when you start a job for the first time. The unknowing of what lies ahead and how the day will go and how hard the work will be.

People joke about being a writer and ask, “Well, what do you really do?” I understand that it is hard to take unpublished writers as serious professionals (though I have been paid to write stories before) but my determination comes down to my new mantra, “It was never between me and them anyway.”