Truths and a bit of Tails: Unexpected Revelations

So, Bill and I just got back from 6 days in Jamaica with my closest friend, Delreen and her husband, Tim. (I know - poor me.)

We had an incredible time… It was the first that we went anywhere as couples and I think it all went well. That is never an easy thing to estimate – while two women can be the best of friends – what happens between their husbands isn’t always as fortunate.

But, at least from our end, we really enjoyed being together and Bill likes Tim (not that way of course…)

We stayed at an all-inclusive, which means our glasses never went empty and our stomachs were always full. And, most importantly – the conversation never stopped and the laughter was uncontainable.

I have to mention the first night – because while it was VERY memorable to the other three – I have absolutely no recollection of it!

After a long day of travel – we road a bus to the hotel… Okay let’s start with the plane ride where I enjoyed 4 Bloody Marys.. then the bus trip where I gulped down three rum and Cokes and somewhere between meeting Delreen and Tim on the beach and waking up the next morning – I have no idea of how much I drank.

I am not proud of myself – but the story is funny enough that it bears repeating. Apparently, we went to dinner that night and while we were up making our salads at the buffet… I wandered off onto the beach with my plate in hand. Tim noticed me (of course it wasn’t my own husband) and nudged Bill to go escort me back to the table before I found myself swimming with my salad in the ocean.

The next morning is where it gets really funny…. As we sat on the beach talking… and for me, catching up – It became more and more painfully obvious that I had drank way too much. For every topic I brought up – Delreen, or Tim, or Bill would say with a chuckle, “We talked about that last night!”

For me, it was all brand new conversation!

No night was quite like that again..but we did some bootie shaking and some shots and jumped off cliffs (the small ones) and you get the idea…

BUT, somewhere between bellying (and my belly sure seems bigger now) up to the swim up pool bar and lazily sipping fruity drinks in a chaise on the beach – a few things sparked insight. (This is a sure sign that I am aging because never before would I have found insight between boozing it up and basking in the sun)

The night we chose to seek an adrenalin rush and jump off cliffs (okay, we watched people jump off the cliffs – we chose to jump in from a small observation deck) I couldn’t help but notice something so humbling and heart wrenching.

On one side of the cliffs stands an exclusive bar – one of the ten best in the world (or so they say). Drinks and food and bands and the most breathtaking sunset. On the other side of the cliff - separated by a chain link fence is a barren park where the kids of Jamaica hang out and show the rest of us how skilled they are at both climbing the rocks (they don’t have a brick walkway like we do) and diving into the water. Sometimes doing handstands on the edge – back flips, you name it. These kids are as good as any I have seen earn gold in the Olympics.

But as “we” stood in our new bathing suits with matching cover-ups – sipping cocktails and throwing out leftover food – these kids swam in their clothes and dried off by the sun – not towels… Surely no drinks or food.

It would be hard for anyone with a sensitive soul not to notice the poetic irony of the landscape for it was not only a fence that divided us – but a cove of water – they on one side and us on the other. We were all there with the same intent – but beyond a bay of water was a whole lot more that divided us.

This revelation hit me again as we drove back to the airport and were able to really take in the Jamaican culture. You know not just the pretty beach and the reggae bands… The places where people actually live and work. Most of these people live in what I would consider poverty. We saw our share of people eating out of garbage cans and walking the stone roads without shoes – wearing nothing but a ragged old pair of shorts and a dirty plastic bag around their waist.

It is hard to grasp at times – the life these people live.

And, being who I am – it is indicative that I will survey the countryside for stray dogs and cats; fearing the worst – that they will be tied up and starving.

But they weren’t. I mean they probably don’t sleep in fuzzy beds or have a basket full of toys at their discretion but their tails were wagging and they looked well fed – or at least fed.

There were only a handful that actually seemed to be “roaming.” The rest were lying next to a group of people – I assume being the family dog.

And that is when true revelation struck. Here I was in a country that at times seems third world: impoverished, desolate, depressed… and yet, their dogs seem well- cared for. Living just as good as the people themselves. It is all relevant.

Passing the shacks and the run down cars – I couldn’t help but think of my own country. This place that is supposed to be wealthy and full of opportunity. Where the majority of people live in houses with adequate amenities – drive in cars and don’t walk barefoot to the nearest store with their only hope being able to buy food for their family – if they have the money today.

We are what they call a civilized society and yet, just days before I left on vacation I spoke with the director of a local dog rescue who told me that they were called in on a case where a woman who ran a grooming facility had knowingly starved over 20 dogs. Just left them in cages without food or water for who knows how long. The irony is that there were bins of food next to the cages.

This happened in a fairly well off town… and the woman had money.

And of course there is my greatest passion: puppy mills. As a country we allow people to shove dogs in cages and breed them until they can breed no more – and it takes years of legislation to make it an illegal practice.

And we are the civilized society? The wealthy, forward thinking country?

Besides enjoying the sun and the bottomless cocktails, I was given the gift of humility and the opportunity for gratitude and still the painful awareness that the country I live in, where freedom reigns and democracy thrives has yet, so much to left to do to become a place that embraces humanity and compassion.