Truths: Why do we fight the male species?

A couple of things happened these last few days that have reminded me why women and men are so different… and made me pause to wonder, “why do we continue to fight the truth of the male species?”

As women, we are always hoping, wishing, needing men to be these things that they always fall short of. Sure, once in great while, they surprise the Hell out of us with flowers, or jewelry but, ultimately, those moments are few and far between. And, we are left with disappointment – even anger and resentment wondering why don’t “they” get it?

Well, here are some glaring truths about men that I pondered this weekend. The first one, that I think we all take for granted, is what men wear. We went to our cabin this weekend and so I laid out things for my husband to pack when he got home. They were my favorite shirts and pants so I piled them up as a way to help him.

He packed them all and never once thought about it. He didn’t look through them and put some back – he just happily threw them in the bag and we were on our way.

So, I ask you, as women,… is there any possible way you would have so easily accepted the outfits your husband laid out for you? Would you have just gladly thrown them in your bag and left for the weekend?

Hell no… Even IF our men were fashionistas – we would not have been happy with their clothing choices. We would look through what they gave us and put at least half back – and then, we would have spent another hour contemplating what we were going to pack.

Because that is who we are. And yet, we still expect men to understand us.

As you all know, I bought and wrapped my own Christmas gifts this year and loved every one of them… I am tired of having high expectations – only to be sadly disappointed. Besides, my husband was thrilled that he had no shopping to do.

And that brings me to another reality check. A few years back, my husband and I were shopping at Water Tower Place and I noticed this beautiful brown sweater. I showed it to my husband – hinting at it being my birthday gift.

He looked at it and shrugged, “Hmm, I didn’t know that you liked brown.”

As he stood in front of me while I was wearing a brown coat, brown shoes, a brown top and a brown scarf!!!

Men – do not notice things that are glaring in front of them – so why do we keep hoping that they will take subtle hints and buy us what we want or do things that we hope for?

It was my birthday this weekend and my husband and my stepdaughter took me shopping to this quaint little town called Princeton near our cabin. I got to browse the stores and pick out things that I wanted. And it was fun… and I got wonderful gifts that I love.

Sure Kristin could have easily picked things out for me – but Bill…probably not. In fact, I think he was confused by what I did pick out. Even though they are the types of things that adorn my closet and jewelry chest.

Men are not us – they don’t think like us and they don’t operate like us… My husband goes golfing every Wednesday in the summer with a few guys… when he comes home and I ask things like, “When is Jonathan moving? How is Chris’s wife after the surgery? When is Mike getting married?”

Bill just looks at me and says, “I have no idea we don’t talk about that!”

As a woman who knows that my husband just spent 3 hours with his friends and has come home without one iota of information – I am stunned. I am at a total loss…

Interestingly enough, when they don’t have a foursome – sometimes I go along and I do ask these questions and the guys are more than happy to share the information - but if I am not there – the night revolves around who had the best drive and who got a new golf club.

And yet, as women we continue to fight against the reality of who men are. We blatantly ignore the facts and we allow ourselves to perpetuate our own disappointment.

I say make it a New Year’s Resolution to make yourself happy and to quit relying on the men in your life to surprise you with your desires. Sure, it destroys the childhood dream of Prince Charming – (But, how many men ever even watched the fairy tales we have yearned our whole lives to live?)

So, if you want that “Happily Ever After” you will have to buy it for yourself!