Truths: Building a history

I just got back from my trip to San Diego to see my new grandson, Oliver, for the first time. He was born Labor Day weekend.

For the last 3 months its been all about Josee because she lives nearby and, now, it was finally going to be about Oliver – I was so excited to meet him.

I have been in limbo with this whole grandma thing at 39 – faced with reality but unsure about embracing it. But when I held Oliver in my arms for the first time – my second grandchild – I finally felt like a grandma.

Oliver is big and chunky and smiley and burpy and funny and a very good baby. At first everything he did was in comparison to what Josee was doing but after a day – none of that mattered and Oliver was just his own little person on his own little terms.

We stayed with my step-daughter, Lindsey and so it was perfect to wake up and get to take care of Oliver first thing in the morning - to see him alert and happy.

Lindsey hadn’t been out much with him – he is only a month old – but that all changed when Abby and I got there – we took him shopping, and lunching and we even took him to the zoo. Of course, he didn’t know he was there – barely opened his eyes to see the pandas (they were amazing – might be the only time I actually see pandas) but I was so excited that I got to be the one to share his first zoo experience.

And that is when it hit me – that night as I was holding him and thinking about our day – I realized that we were creating our own history. I would be a part of his life from the very beginning – I would know when he went to the zoo for the first time and when he took his first steps and what toy he liked best as a child. I will know all of these things and be a part of each of them.

That changed everything for me. See when I became a part of Lindsey and Kristin’s life they were pretty much all grown up – sure, I have seen them become adults – graduating high school, college now becoming moms – but I missed out on all the beginnings and at times, that makes me sad.

But, with Josee and Oliver I get to see it all from the start – I am and will be a part of their whole lives and that is comforting to me. It makes being this blended family more whole.

There is so much to look forward to and these first few months are only the beginnings of so much more to come.

My 5 days with Oliver were amazing. Snuggling with him, feeding him – even changing him was fun. To be a part of his life and even see him change in just the few days I was there is beautiful.

This grandma thing is pretty magical – I get to just show up and enjoy the moments – to take it all in and to even step back and just stare in awe at this little boy who is growing every day and making me smile and making me realize that we get to build this history together – to share these journeys together – I have the chance to teach him and most importantly, I get the chance to love him from day one.