Okay, so the stove came yesterday. I spent the last two days in preparation… Cleaning out the pantry, organizing the shelves… Anticipating my moment of sheer cooking inspiration. This was going to be “it.” This long awaited time in my life when I would not only have the urge to cook and bake – but a time when I would enjoy it on my new and beautiful new stainless steel stove.
What a pipe dream.
Monday night my husband unhooked the gas line and pulled the old clunker out and found, of course, what looked like the remains of a cat – or at least enough fur to make a new cat. That and a Barbie shoe, some hair ties, toy mice and even a few crumbs – those must have come from the previous owners.
To my pleasant surprise he began wiping down the floor and by bedtime – the area was prepped for our new baby…
The delivery truck pulled in at 11am – just like they said they would and I was getting excited. The nice man came to see where the new one would go and he and a partner strapped up the old one and took it away.
I wonder where those go? Does someone want them? Or is there a graveyard for appliances that just don’t work anymore – they have done their duty and now they rest in some peaceful place conversing with each other about all the mishaps they have endured through the years – turkeys that were burnt, birthday cakes they made, water that boiled over and yes, chatted about people like me – who had no business even turning them on. Do they favor people like me – who made their life easy or would they rather be busy making feasts? Hmmm I wonder.
Anyway, the old guy was out the door and my new life was heading in. That is until deliveryman told me that I should have had professional installers with this stove. That he was unable to hook it up the way this kind of stove needed. He was just a delivery guy and I would have to contact the salesperson. I even got a call from Best Buy while the delivery guy stood in front of me – explaining the mix-up.
This can’t be happening… I was on the verge of a life changing moment.
The truck pulled away as did my dream of baking the perfect meatloaf and left me with a gorgeous range in the middle of my kitchen.
Of course I did what any wife does –I called my husband. I explained to him like the delivery guy explained to me and added that I think he could just do it when he got home – it didn’t sound that complicated.
He hesitated but like any good husband – agreed that he would look into it when he got home.
Deflated – I circled my kitchen… and noticed the ugly green porcelain sink that we have and thought, “Maybe we could replace that this weekend.”
Knowing that I wouldn’t be making homemade mashed potatoes or kneading a meatloaf in the afternoon, I got on the internet and googled, “Replacing a kitchen sink” I watched the Home Depot video and thought, “Yep, we can do this – Hell, I could do this.”
So, I surfed the web for sinks and comforted my disappointment with the stove with the hope for a new sink.
A lot of other things went wrong during the day – and by the time we got home from visiting my grandma in the hospital – my husband had the stove opened up and concern on his face.
I could see that the news he was about to share was not good… and in his nicest voice he said, “We have a bigger problem.”
See, the gas line which comes up in the floor was 4 inches from the wall – which mean that my slide-in range was not going to slide all the way in. No, instead it would leave a 4-inch gaping hole. My pretty stove was going to leave an unsightly space between the wall and the range.
This is NOT how this was supposed to go. My husband finagled a few things to see if he could make them work but to no avail… so we did what any couple does – we went down to the basement remodel and grabbed our ingenious contractor, Chris.
Unfortunately, gas lines don’t bend and kink like other things – so there was no easy fix for this rather big problem.
Instead, Chris replied, “Well, when we remodel your kitchen in the spring we could re-run the gas line and make it work…”
Before he could finish – my husband was choking on his beer and asking, “Did I know we were remodeling the kitchen in the spring.”
“That is not important right now,” I replied… “What can you do, Chris?”
Deep breath – my kitchen remodel was between Chris and I - I had planned to tell Bill about it one night after he has a few drinks… Yada yada.
So, for now Chris is going to fill the black hole with some matching trim and for now, it will be okay.
By the time my head it the pillow, my excitement and anticipation for the day was left mutilated by the realities that overcame me.
That day a few weeks ago when I left the store glassy-eyed – planning my dinner parties was now nothing more than a faint memory – a broken dream – a burnt cake.
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